When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me (1 Corinthians 13:11).
This is the old Christian understanding of the world, the understanding that happiness is the fruit of other things, chief among them our own holiness, and so we must undergo a transformation. We must be smoothed over. Just like the fairy tales, we must share in God’s holiness before the story is finished.
This flies in the face of the more popular view of the world that’s crept in recently—the happiness view. This is the idea that frames most people’s expectations of marriage (and everything else)—the view that we’re here for our happiness and so you’d better make me happy.
So it comes as quite a disruption when we begin to realize that God might have other things in mind.